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catfish1
Posts: 1629
catfish1
   Old Thread  #1897 9 Jul 2013 at 8.59pm  0  Login    Register
Well done the British bloke who won Wimbledon this year.
so much better than that scotch ****who lost last year.
catfish1
Posts: 1629
catfish1
   Old Thread  #1896 9 Jul 2013 at 8.57pm  0  Login    Register
investigators are interviewing the Korean pilot following Sats plane crash.Lan Ding Gon Wong says his velly solly.
catfish1
Posts: 1629
catfish1
   Old Thread  #1895 9 Jul 2013 at 8.54pm  0  Login    Register
In reply to Post #1890
WaftyCranker
Posts: 3455
WaftyCranker
   Old Thread  #1894 8 Jul 2013 at 6.09pm  0  Login    Register
Serena Williams has decided to shave her hair for charity.

From her chest to her bollox, no doubt.
sik
Posts: 2391
sik
   Old Thread  #1893 8 Jul 2013 at 5.34am  0  Login    Register
My wife walked in on an argument between our son and I. When he ran out of the room crying, I turned to the wife and said, "I wish I'd used a condom now."

Horrified, she said, "What? You wish our son had never been born?"

"No," I replied. "I've got his girlfriend pregnant."
thorque
Posts: 1
   Old Thread  #1892 4 Jul 2013 at 6.04pm  0  Login    Register
hakhak
WaftyCranker
Posts: 3455
WaftyCranker
   Old Thread  #1891 4 Jul 2013 at 12.17pm  0  Login    Register
In reply to Post #1886
harveyboy
Posts: 1438
   Old Thread  #1890 3 Jul 2013 at 9.33pm  0  Login    Register
In reply to Post #1889
west midlands police are looking for 2 racist attackers-i have one application form who wants the other????
carpy09
Posts: 13989
carpy09
   Old Thread  #1889 2 Jul 2013 at 6.42pm  0  Login    Register
In reply to Post #1884
sik
Posts: 2391
sik
   Old Thread  #1888 2 Jul 2013 at 3.02pm  0  Login    Register
One day this thirty year old virgin stats getting these extremely painful sensations around her vagina. She goes in to her gynecologist and he ask her about her sex life. She replies I'm a virgin so there is no sex. He ask about her public bathroom usage habits. I work from home and I always use the bathroom before I go shopping. So there is no public bathroom usage. After a few more questions he gives her an examine and comes back saying " ma'am, I don't know what's wrong but you definitely don't have crabs". She says that she wants a second opinion and sees another gynecologist. He ask all the same questions and she gives all the same answers. He gives her an examination and comes back with the same results as the first dr. So she decides to get a third opinion. She sees a third doctor, gets asked all the same questions, gives all the same answers and receives yet another examine. The dr comes in and says I have some good and some bad news. The good news is you don't have crabs. The bad news is that your cherry's so ripe you have fruit flies
sik
Posts: 2391
sik
   Old Thread  #1887 2 Jul 2013 at 2.49pm  0  Login    Register
In reply to Post #1884
sik
Posts: 2391
sik
   Old Thread  #1886 2 Jul 2013 at 2.48pm  0  Login    Register
I went out with a girl last night and asked her back to my place.She said,"I just want to tell you,I don't sleep with someone on a first date."

I replied,"That's okay,once I've fcuked you I'll phone a taxi to take you home so you can sleep in your own bed.
WaftyCranker
Posts: 3455
WaftyCranker
   Old Thread  #1885 2 Jul 2013 at 6.51am  0  Login    Register
In reply to Post #1884
ralph69
Posts: 10387
ralph69
   Old Thread  #1884 1 Jul 2013 at 10.16pm  0  Login    Register
In reply to Post #1883
got chatting to this bird in the pub last night and was telling her about my talent
of being able to tell what day of week a woman was born on , just by playing with her tits.
she stuck her chest out and said "go on then , prove it"
after about 3 minutes of me fondling her tits she says " well, what day was i born on then ?
i said , ****ing yesterday
WaftyCranker
Posts: 3455
WaftyCranker
   Old Thread  #1883 1 Jul 2013 at 7.26pm  0  Login    Register
"I shoved a firework up a rabbits @rse this weekend" said Little Johnny

"Johnny!" Exclaimed his teacher disgustingly, "Rectum"

Johnny replied "Yes it did, blew his boll**ks off Miss"
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