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In reply to Post #1 My girlfriend and I broke up due to religious differences...
She failed to worship me.
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Our Grandad died of a Viagra overdose.
To this day, we still regret not burying him just a few inches deeper.
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In reply to Post #83
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In reply to Post #83
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In reply to Post #87 the village idiot decides to sell his car , so his mate says to him
"before you sell it , wind the clock back a bit"
good idea says the idiot.
he sees him a few days later and asks him how he got on.
he says ive decided to keep it now , its only done 7000 miles
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In reply to Post #86 Wayne Rooney went to see Fabrice Muamba in hospital...."it was amazing to see him, and he even strung a sentence together" said Fabrice
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In reply to Post #85 mods.......thats a lot worse than mine!!!!!!
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In reply to Post #83
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When he thankfully regained consciousness, fabrice muamba asked about the football results. On being told that Torres had scored twice he replied 'bloody hell! How long was I out for?!?'
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In reply to Post #80 Predictive texting is for aunts!
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R.I.P. Jocky Wilson - not only a great darts player, but a great singer.I loved Reet Petite.
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In reply to Post #75 Being told that there is a cure for dyslexia is music to my arse
Fantastic.
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In reply to Post #1 What's hard, black and makes Tulisa look incompetent?
A microphone.
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