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   Old Thread  #1987 22 Oct 2013 at 3.45pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #1986
gone a bit quiet on the joke front recently :(
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   Old Thread  #1986 11 Oct 2013 at 7.55pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #1982
either that or his missus has ran off with,Ryan Giggs
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   Old Thread  #1985 11 Oct 2013 at 7.45pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
ive just had some great financial news.
the little african kid that i sponsor has
been eaten by a lion.
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   Old Thread  #1984 11 Oct 2013 at 7.42pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
my ex-wife is spreading false rumours about me being schizophrenic.
Well, three can play that game
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   Old Thread  #1983 11 Oct 2013 at 7.40pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #1978
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   Old Thread  #1982 11 Oct 2013 at 3.59pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #1981
city supporter ???
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   Old Thread  #1981 11 Oct 2013 at 1.01pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #1980
Q: Did you hear that the Post Office just recalled their latest stamps?
A: They had pictures of Manchester United Players on them ... and people couldn't figure out which side to spit on.

Q: What do you call 20 Manchester United Fans skydiving from an aeroplane?
A: Diahorrea


Q: What do Manchester United Fans and sperm have in common?
A: One in 3,000,000 has a chance of becoming a human being.
.

Q: What have Man Utd and a 3-pin plug got in common?
A: They're both bugger-all use in Europe.

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   Old Thread  #1980 5 Oct 2013 at 6.12pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
The wife's sister knocked me out yesterday, I was so f----ng angry, what sort of a sick bitch puts chloroform into her dirty knickers!!
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   Old Thread  #1979 5 Oct 2013 at 6.04pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
The missus packed my bags and threw me out, as I walked out the door she screamed "I hope you have a slow and painful deaths you old *******" "oh" I replied, "so you want me to stay now"
Boom Boom
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   Old Thread  #1978 4 Oct 2013 at 4.21pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
worst decision i ever made was having a penis extension...

my house looks ****ing stupid now
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   Old Thread  #1977 3 Oct 2013 at 8.20pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
If electricity always follows the path of least resistance, why doesn't lightning only strike in France?
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   Old Thread  #1976 1 Oct 2013 at 10.29am Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
the vicar see's little Johnny walking down the road with a bottle

Vicar.....hello Johnny how are you today and what have you there in the bottle?

Johnny....It's acid

Vicar....that's very dangerous Johnny, can i swap it for some holy water, the other day i rubbed some on a ladies belly and she had a baby

Johnny....That's nufink i put some acid on my dog's nut's and he overtook a motorbike.
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   Old Thread  #1975 1 Oct 2013 at 10.05am Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #1973
MY wife got a vibrator, still don't know how to use it, broke 3 teeth last night
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   Old Thread  #1974 28 Sept 2013 at 10.29pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #1972
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   Old Thread  #1973 28 Sept 2013 at 9.25pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
My mate asked me the other day what I'm getting my wife for christmas , I said I'm gonna get her a new dress and a vibrator .......... If she doesn't like her dress she can go **** herself.
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