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 #2052 14 Dec 2013 at 5.45pm | |   |
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The wife was texting me all day yesterday saying she was in casualty....I watched all 50 minutes of it and didn't see her once! She's still not home and I'm getting hungry!!
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#2051 13 Dec 2013 at 9.37pm | | |
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In reply to Post #2049
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#2050 13 Dec 2013 at 9.09pm | | |
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In reply to Post #2049
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#2049 13 Dec 2013 at 3.17pm | | |
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A young lad and his grandpa go fishing one day. They set up next to the river and sit back in their camping chairs waiting for the fish to start to bite. After a while, the grandpa pulls out a pack of cigarettes and lights one up. The kid is really interested and asks his grandpa if he can have one. Grandpa turns to the kid and says, "Can you touch your a***h*** with your penis?"
The boy replies that he can't.
"Well," says Grandpa, "then you're not old enough yet."
Another hour or so goes by and then Grandpa pulls out a can of beer. Again the boy is interested and asks if he could have some. Grandpa repeats his earlier question and says that he isn't old enough yet.
A little while later the boy opens his tackle box and takes out a packet of sweets. Grandpa looks over and thinks that he would like one.
"Can I have one of your sweets, son?"
The kid looks at Grandpa and says to him, "Can you touch your a***h*** with your penis?"
"I most certainly can!" says Grandpa.
To which the boy replies, "Well then go f*** yourself then, you old b******."
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#2048 12 Dec 2013 at 1.26pm | | |
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In reply to Post #2047
You beating everyone to it mate 
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#2047 12 Dec 2013 at 11.59am | | |
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It's very very very quiet on here,what's everyone lost their sense of humour  
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#2046 8 Dec 2013 at 11.03am | | |
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My wife's doing an experiment.She's wearing a burka for a week to get people's reaction.So far she's been kicked,punched and spat at.F**k knows what's going to happen when she leaves the house!
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#2045 8 Dec 2013 at 10.59am | | |
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Nelson Mandela's a legend and inspiration to every black man.
Never worked a day in his life and spent half of it in prison.
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#2044 8 Dec 2013 at 10.57am | | |
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Never has there been such a mass outpouring of grief this morning from Black people,after waking up to the news that KFC Great Yarmouth is closed due to flood damage....
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#2043 8 Dec 2013 at 10.54am | | |
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In reply to Post #2042
Micheal Barrymores ears *****ed up at the news Tom Daley has came out as gay.At last the thought,someone that doesn't mind taking it up the arse and can swim as we'll.
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#2042 7 Dec 2013 at 11.18pm | | |
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In reply to Post #2039
he put it out on you tube that he takes it up the pooh tube.............. tom daley , tom daley , tom daley
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#2041 6 Dec 2013 at 9.21pm | | |
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Its been reported that dyslexic africans have been leaving flowers at the doors of Nissan main dealer
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#2040 6 Dec 2013 at 9.09pm | | |
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apparentley theres thousands of people gathering outside nelson mandella house.
del boy and rodney have told em to **** off
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#2039 6 Dec 2013 at 1.08pm | | |
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Following Tom Daley admitting he's gay,rumours are rife that his boyfriend is a fellow Olympian.
My money's on Fatima Whitbread.
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#2038 6 Dec 2013 at 1.04pm | | |
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How many Tourette's sufferers does it take to c**t a lightboll**ks?
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