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 #125 10 May 2012 at 2.11pm | |  |   |
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In reply to Post #124
The only way to pull off a Sunday afternoon “quickie” with their 8-year old son in the apartment was to send him out on the balcony with a Mars Bar and tell him to report on all the Street activities.
Their 8-year old began his commentary as his parents put their plan into operation:
'There's a car being towed from the parking lot,' he shouted.
... ... 'An ambulance just drove by!'
'Looks like the Anderson 's have company,' he called out.
'Matt's riding a new bike!'
'Looks like the Sanders are moving!'
'Jason is on his skate board!'
After a few moments he announced, 'The Coopers are having a shag!'
Startled, his mum and dad shot up in bed!
Dad cautiously called out, 'How do you know that?'
'Jimmy Cooper is standing on his balcony with a Mars Bar
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#124 9 May 2012 at 11.05pm | | | |
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In reply to Post #123
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#123 9 May 2012 at 8.39pm | | | |
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I came home from the pub four hours late last night.
"Where the **** have you been?" screamed my wife.
I said, "I've been playing poker with some blokes."
"Playing poker with some blokes?" she repeated. "Well, you can pack your bags and go!"
"So can you" I said, "This isn't our house anymore."
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#122 9 May 2012 at 6.19pm | | | |
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Ann Summers outlets are selling a new alcoholic vaginal gel for women... now when their man goes down, he can have a bevvy as well..!
Anti-drink campaigners, however, want it banned amid fears of 24 hour m1nge drinking...... 
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#121 8 May 2012 at 10.59pm | | | |
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In reply to Post #1
A big ole bird goes to the doc's and says "doc i've got a lump in each boob?"
.....Doc reply's " its you knee's love!!"
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#120 4 May 2012 at 10.14pm | | | |
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In reply to Post #119
 
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| | | noj | | Posts: 11264 |  | | Social photographer... | |
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#119 4 May 2012 at 2.02pm | | | |
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Give a man a fish, and he'll feed his family for a day.
Give him a fishing rod, and he'll **** off for the whole weekend.
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#118 2 May 2012 at 1.25pm | | | |
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In reply to Post #1
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#117 29 Apr 2012 at 8.17pm | | | |
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In reply to Post #116
My mate set me up on a blind date....
He said, "She's a lovely girl, but there's something you should know... She's expecting a baby."
I felt like a right bloody idiot waiting in the pub wearing nothing but a nappy!!!!!
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| | | sik | | Posts: 2391 |  | |
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#116 29 Apr 2012 at 7.53pm | | | |
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The lady next door came to my door asking if I knew anything about her washing missing from her clothes line.I almost sh.t her pants
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#115 24 Apr 2012 at 7.49am | | | |
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In reply to Post #114
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#114 19 Apr 2012 at 8.31pm | | | |
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What's the difference between oral sex and anal sex?
Oral sex makes your day, anal sex makes your hole weak.
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| | | mal | | Posts: 7940 |  | |
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#113 15 Apr 2012 at 3.09pm | | | |
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How do you kill a circus?
Go for the juggler!
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#112 15 Apr 2012 at 2.09pm | | | |
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In reply to Post #111
After our divorce i killed the wife and dumped her body but kept her *****. my new girlfriend hasn't a clue when i say im going upstairs to have a go on the ex box
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#111 15 Apr 2012 at 2.01pm | | | |
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In reply to Post #110
Stephen hawking just came back from his first date in years!His glasses were smashed, he had a broken wrist, twisted ankle and grazed knees. apparently she stood him up!
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