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   Old Thread  #321 10 Sept 2012 at 7.09pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
One day, a mum was cleaning her son's room and under the bed she found a bondage-S&M magazine. Highly upset she showed it to her husband.
He looked at it and handed it back to her without a word.
She finally asked him, "Well, what should we do about this?"
The dad looked at her and said, "Well whatever you do, don't spank him!"
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   Old Thread  #320 10 Sept 2012 at 6.31pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
Man teases his ex-wife's new husband: "So, dude how was the second-hand Stuff?"
New husband: "Not bad. After the first 3 inches, she was brand new
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   Old Thread  #319 10 Sept 2012 at 6.30pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
A loud scream comes from the bedroom and the husband runs in. He sees a guy leaping out of the window..
Wife yells: That guy just screwed me twice!
Husband: Twice? Why didn't you call me in after he screwed you once?
Wife: Because I thought it was you, until he started the second time
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   Old Thread  #318 10 Sept 2012 at 6.29pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
Three old men were sitting around complaining about how much their hands Shook.
The first geezer said, "My hands shake so bad that when I shaved this morning I cut my face!"
The second old fogey one-upped him. "My hands shake so bad that when I trimmed my garden yesterday I sliced all my flowers!"
The third old man laughed and said, "That's nothing. My hands shake so bad that when I took a p1ss yesterday, I came three times
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   Old Thread  #317 8 Sept 2012 at 7.03pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
A couple of weeks after embarrassing the Royal family with his Vegas pictures, Prince Harry has been deployed to Afghanistan.

Nice one Philip, that'll look a bit less suspicious than another car crash.
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   Old Thread  #316 7 Sept 2012 at 9.55pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #1
Is not every joke offensive in some way or another ? its not meant to hurt anyone,its just a JOKE !!! its funny and it makes people laugh,it should not be taken seriously
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   Old Thread  #315 6 Sept 2012 at 6.22pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #313
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   Old Thread  #314 6 Sept 2012 at 5.29pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
When the Pope toured Ireland he was asked what he thought of County Down.. he said "It's not the same since Carol Vordeman left"..
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   Old Thread  #313 6 Sept 2012 at 1.38pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
A man is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower, when the doorbell rings. The wife quickly wraps herself in a towel and runs downstairs. When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next-door neighbour. Before she says a word, Bob says, “I’ll give you $800 to drop that towel.” After thinking for a moment, the woman drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After a few seconds, Bob hands her $800 and leaves.

The woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs. When she gets to the bathroom, her husband asks, “Who was that?” “It was Bob the next door neighbour,” she replies.

“Great!” the husband says, “did he give you the $800 he owes me?”
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   Old Thread  #312 6 Sept 2012 at 11.57am Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
Some sl.g was giving me a hand job last night. "You're really good at this," I said, "what's your secret?" "Years of practice," she giggled."You've done this to loads of guys then? I asked."No" came the reply, "my name used to be Derek."
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   Old Thread  #311 6 Sept 2012 at 11.56am Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #309
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   Old Thread  #310 6 Sept 2012 at 11.54am Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
A teacher in a Detroit kindergarten class asked the kids what kind of sound a pig makes. Little Tyrone stood up and yelled: "FREEZE, MUTHAF.CKA!".
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   Old Thread  #309 6 Sept 2012 at 11.52am Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
Man pinches wife's breasts and says if we firm these up we can get rid of the bra. Wife grabs his penis & says if we firm this up we can get rid of the milkman
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   Old Thread  #308 5 Sept 2012 at 5.40pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
I got in touch with my inner self today.Thats the last time i buy Tesco value toilet roll.
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   Old Thread  #307 5 Sept 2012 at 9.59am Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
After 100 years at the bottom of the Atlantic Irish divers were amazed that the swimming pool on the Titanic was still full
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