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   Old Thread  #570 17 Nov 2012 at 9.58am Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
My new girlfriend gives ma marks out of ten when we have sex.Last night for example i shoved it right up her a jacksy and she yelled "nine,nine!"
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   Old Thread  #569 17 Nov 2012 at 9.53am Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
Getting old is a terrible thing.This morning i went upstairs then forgot why,so i went back down to try to jog my memory......... That's when i $hit myself.
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   Old Thread  #568 16 Nov 2012 at 8.25pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
Some men think that using a moisturiser after you've had a shave is a bit gay.

I don't, I just think it makes my legs lovely and soft.
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Social photographer...
   Old Thread  #567 15 Nov 2012 at 9.02pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
An oap is heading down the m1 to visit an old friend, suddenly he receives a phone call from his daughter.

"Dad be careful, I've just heard on the radio there's a nutter driving the wrong way down the m1"

"Not just the one love, there's bloody hundreds of the ****s!"
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   Old Thread  #566 15 Nov 2012 at 6.32pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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Latest football results: Real Madrid - 1 Surreal Madrid - fish
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   Old Thread  #565 14 Nov 2012 at 9.20pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
"After stubbing his cigar in my eye because I wouldn't suck his cock, I hope that ******* Savile rots in hell."

P.Bear, BBC Studios, London.
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   Old Thread  #564 14 Nov 2012 at 8.34pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
Just been to a bestiality orgy.

Every man and his dog was there.
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   Old Thread  #563 14 Nov 2012 at 7.02pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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   Old Thread  #562 14 Nov 2012 at 6.48pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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   Old Thread  #561 14 Nov 2012 at 6.09pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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   Old Thread  #560 14 Nov 2012 at 6.09pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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ADULT SCRABBLE.

Rearrange the letters to spell out an important part of the human body which is even more important when erect.

P N E S I

The people who wrote spine became doctors...

The rest are sadly the sort of people that are my friends!.
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   Old Thread  #559 14 Nov 2012 at 5.56pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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   Old Thread  #558 14 Nov 2012 at 8.59am Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
I just got sacked from my new job as a bingo caller.

Apparently "A meal for two with a hairy view" is not the way to call number 69
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   Old Thread  #557 13 Nov 2012 at 9.49pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
2 interesting facts about me:

firstly, my knob is the same length as three Argos pens

second fact, I'm banned from Argos
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   Old Thread  #556 13 Nov 2012 at 7.18pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #554
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