CarpForum - Fishing Forum
  Already registered? [Log-In]  New user? [Register]

Want 11,000+ anglers a day to see your product or service?  Click HERE to see how
Home Who's Online Member List Gallery Downloads Fish Ins Weather
Rules / Usage Help / FAQs Search Articles The Carp Shop
  New Posts: 0
   Joke Thread
 [Log-In]  [Register] 
WaftyCranker is not surfing CarpForum at the moment
View the profile of WaftyCranker (Ian)
Contact details supplied to MODs
WaftyCranker
Posts: 3448
   Old Thread  #818 3 Jan 2013 at 7.03pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #817


Anyway..... Back on track..

Chelsea fans wanting to save money on a Demba Ba replica shirt?

Just cut off the word 'DROG' from the one you wore last season.
BEHAPPY is not surfing CarpForum at the moment
View the profile of BEHAPPY (Zafar)
BEHAPPY
Posts: 44
   Old Thread  #816 3 Jan 2013 at 5.07pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #815
writting pakistani is one thing writting paki is another thing ,so lets kill the story here and write a funny joke.
catfish1 is not surfing CarpForum at the moment
View the profile of catfish1 (Paul)
Contact details supplied to MODs
catfish1
Posts: 1629
   Old Thread  #815 3 Jan 2013 at 2.31pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #814
Chill out,you don't have to be Pakistani to be a c--t,this is a joke tread and as for your post before that,you lost me there .be happy

BEHAPPY is not surfing CarpForum at the moment
View the profile of BEHAPPY (Zafar)
BEHAPPY
Posts: 44
   Old Thread  #814 3 Jan 2013 at 12.37pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #788
saying paki **** is not nice is it
BEHAPPY is not surfing CarpForum at the moment
View the profile of BEHAPPY (Zafar)
BEHAPPY
Posts: 44
   Old Thread  #813 3 Jan 2013 at 10.30am Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #787
must have used all ur hair for embroidery
SlugHunter is not surfing CarpForum at the moment
View the profile of SlugHunter (Martin)
Contact details supplied to MODs
SlugHunter
Posts: 22699
   Old Thread  #812 2 Jan 2013 at 4.17pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
The wife wasn't too happy when I told her I wanted a full-sized tattoo of Megan Fox's face.

"I won't lie and tell you I like the idea." She said.

"And where would you like that?"

"Well if I'm honest," I told her..

"Somewhere between your hairline and your chin."
catfish1 is not surfing CarpForum at the moment
View the profile of catfish1 (Paul)
Contact details supplied to MODs
catfish1
Posts: 1629
   Old Thread  #811 1 Jan 2013 at 8.28pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #808
SlugHunter is not surfing CarpForum at the moment
View the profile of SlugHunter (Martin)
Contact details supplied to MODs
SlugHunter
Posts: 22699
   Old Thread  #810 1 Jan 2013 at 7.49pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
"Have you ever seen a twenty pound note all crumpled up?" asked the wife.

"No," I said.

She gave me a sexy little smile, reached into her cleavage and pulled out a crumpled twenty pound note.

"Have you ever seen a fifty pound note all crumpled up?" she asked.

"No," I said.

She gave me another sexy little smile, reached into her knickers and pulled out a crumpled fifty pound note.

"Now," she said, "have you ever seen 30,000 pounds all crumpled up?"

"No," I said, intrigued.

"Well, go and take a quick look in the garage."
sik is not surfing CarpForum at the moment
View the profile of sik (Simon)
Contact details supplied to MODs
sik
Posts: 2391
   Old Thread  #809 1 Jan 2013 at 6.23pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
Cop pulls over a car for driving too slow.

Cop walks up to the car & sees an elderly woman behind the wheel.

Cop: Excuse me mam, can you tell me why you were driving so slow on the highway?

Driver: Officer, I was only going the speed limit. There was a sign back a half mile that said the it was 14mph.

Cop: Mam, the speed limit is 55mph, the sign you saw was for this road, Highway 14.

Driver: Oh my, that makes a lot of sense now. I apologize & I'll make sure I look closer at the signs.

The cop then looks around the car & notices that all of the passengers look like they've seen a ghost.

Cop: Is everyone alright?

Driver: Oh yes. They'll be fine. They always have that look on their face after I drive on highway 151
WaftyCranker is not surfing CarpForum at the moment
View the profile of WaftyCranker (Ian)
Contact details supplied to MODs
WaftyCranker
Posts: 3448
   Old Thread  #808 1 Jan 2013 at 8.12am Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
Last. Nite I had a w**k just before 12 so it felt like the whole country was behinds counting down a cheering me on!
carpy09 is not surfing CarpForum at the moment
View the profile of carpy09 (Chris)
Contact details supplied to MODs
carpy09
Posts: 13100
   Old Thread  #807 31 Dec 2012 at 9.13pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #806
jimmyAd is not surfing CarpForum at the moment
View the profile of jimmyAd (Jim)
Contact details supplied to MODs
jimmyAd
Posts: 8939
   Old Thread  #806 31 Dec 2012 at 8.39pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
I got 3 young kids and work all year to make sure they get what they want christmas morning, only for that fat **** with the beard to get all the credit.....my fault really for marrying her
carpy09 is not surfing CarpForum at the moment
View the profile of carpy09 (Chris)
Contact details supplied to MODs
carpy09
Posts: 13100
   Old Thread  #805 31 Dec 2012 at 3.45pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #798
Bluemoon1 is not surfing CarpForum at the moment
View the profile of Bluemoon1 (Jason)
Contact details supplied to MODs
Bluemoon1
Posts: 466
   Old Thread  #804 31 Dec 2012 at 2.28pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #802
Happy new year to you all. I am contacting you now as I suffer from premature congratulations.
davecarp1 is not surfing CarpForum at the moment
View the profile of davecarp1 (Dave)
Contact details supplied to MODs
davecarp1
Posts: 418
   Old Thread  #803 31 Dec 2012 at 2.27pm Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
In reply to Post #778
true so true
Page: 126.333333333333 of 180  
  
   Copyright 2002-2021  -  www.CarpForum.co.uk contact : webmaster@carpforum.co.uk