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 #1338 14 Mar 2013 at 10.28pm | |   |
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In reply to Post #1337
A knob has a sad life. His hair's a mess, his family is nuts, his neighbor's an *******, his bestfriend's a pussy, and his owner beats him.
Son: Dad, what does 'gay' mean?
Dad: the dictionary says It means 'to be happy'.
Son: Are you gay?
Father: No, son. I have a wife.
little Tommy comes home from school and is sitting eating his tea.
"mum what are bitches and pussy?"
his mothers annoyed but thinks for a second and then points to the dog "thats a bitch, its a female dog" she then points at the cat "and thats a pussy"
little tommy finishes his tea and goes to find his dad. "Dad what are bitches and pussy?" his dad thinks for a second, looks in a drawer and takes out a porn mag and draws a circle around a womans crotch.
"whats this dad?"
"thats your answer son, everything inside the circle is the pussy and everything outside the circle is the bitch"
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#1337 14 Mar 2013 at 9.57pm | | |
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In reply to Post #1327
 quality
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#1336 14 Mar 2013 at 8.24pm | | |
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In reply to Post #1334
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#1335 14 Mar 2013 at 8.21pm | | |
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In reply to Post #1334
 
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#1334 14 Mar 2013 at 8.03pm | | |
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In reply to Post #1333
WOMAN'S DIARY
5 March 2013 Tuesday
Saw him in the evening and he was acting really strangely.
I'd been shopping in the afternoon with the girls
and was a bit late meeting him, thought it might be that.
The bar was really crowded and loud,
so I suggested we go somewhere quieter to talk.
He was still very subdued and distracted
so I suggested we went somewhere nice to eat.
All through dinner he just didn't seem himself
- he hardly laughed and didn't seem to be
paying any attention to me or to what I was saying,
I just knew that something was wrong.
He dropped me back home and I wondered
if he was going to come in,
He hesitated but followed.
I asked him what was wrong,
but he just half shook his head and turned the television on.
After about ten minutes of silence I said that I was going upstairs to bed,
I put my arms around him and told him that I loved him deeply,
He just gave a sigh and a sad sort of smile.
He didn't follow me up immediately but came up later and,
to my surprise, we made love
- but he still seemed distant and a bit cold.
I cried myself to sleep -
I think he's planning to leave me -
maybe he's found someone else.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
MAN'S DIARY:
Tuesday 5 March
Man U lost.
Gutted.
Got a shag though
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#1333 14 Mar 2013 at 7.45pm | | |
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In reply to Post #1327
Get in lad
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#1332 14 Mar 2013 at 6.17pm | | |
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In reply to Post #1331
My computer beat me at chess. But it’s no match for me at kick-boxing.
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#1331 14 Mar 2013 at 5.49pm | | |
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In reply to Post #1327
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#1330 14 Mar 2013 at 5.48pm | | |
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In reply to Post #1324
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#1329 14 Mar 2013 at 4.46pm | | |
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In reply to Post #1327
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#1328 14 Mar 2013 at 4.08pm | | |
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In reply to Post #1327
love it
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#1327 14 Mar 2013 at 2.25pm | | |
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Last night I was talking to a young, good looking woman. She asked me if I like breasts or legs. I told her what I really liked, was a nice shaved snatch.
Apparently I'm not welcome in KFC anymore.
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#1326 14 Mar 2013 at 2.25pm | | |
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In reply to Post #1324
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| | | sik | | Posts: 2391 |  | |
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#1325 14 Mar 2013 at 1.28pm | | |
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In reply to Post #1324
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#1324 14 Mar 2013 at 1.17pm | | |
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A welsh farmer was f--king his prize ewe when his sheepdog came over and started licking his ---hole.
Although it helped him come quicker,he couldn't help but think-dogs are dirty b.....ds!.
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