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   Old Thread  #1570 17 Apr 2013 at 6.31pm  Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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   Old Thread  #1569 17 Apr 2013 at 4.16pm  Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
The police asked me to identify what they thought was my girlfriends body.They pulled the sheet back to show her face."l can't be certain."l told him.The sheet went back a bit further to reveal her breasts and hard nipples "Sorry,but im still not sure."Then they took the sheet completely off and i had a good look at the body and shaved *****,"That's definitely not her,Officer""Are you sure?""Yep.My girlfriends not black.
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   Old Thread  #1568 17 Apr 2013 at 2.51pm  Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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A top British scientist has invented a bra that stops tits bouncing up and down and prevents nipples from sticking out in cold weather,his colleagues have kicked his +++++++ head in!
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   Old Thread  #1567 17 Apr 2013 at 2.48pm  Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
Women wake up yawning and men with an erection.

Coincidence?

I think not.
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   Old Thread  #1566 17 Apr 2013 at 2.44pm  Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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   Old Thread  #1565 17 Apr 2013 at 2.42pm  Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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#1556
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   Old Thread  #1564 17 Apr 2013 at 2.37pm  Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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A woman is standing at the edge of a cliff trying to get the nerve to jump off. A passing tramp stops and says, "Since you're about to kill yourself, if you don't mind, could we have sex please?" The woman says, "No, f**k off." The tramp turns to leave and replies, "Fine, I'll just go and wait at the bottom."
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   Old Thread  #1563 17 Apr 2013 at 12.25pm  Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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   Old Thread  #1562 17 Apr 2013 at 12.20pm  Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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   Old Thread  #1561 17 Apr 2013 at 12.16pm  Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
I've just been watching Margaret Thatcher's funeral and I've gone through an entire box of tissues.

Her granddaughter is something else.
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   Old Thread  #1560 17 Apr 2013 at 9.31am  Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
Stuart Hall is to commentate on his new TV show.

'It's a cock out' hits the screens this Autumn.
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   Old Thread  #1559 17 Apr 2013 at 2.40am  Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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[From the old thread] Our sex life was waning, so I said to the wife we should try a little role-playing to spice things up a bit. I said, "Would you like to play a rape game?" She said "No way!" I said, "That's the spirit!"
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   Old Thread  #1558 16 Apr 2013 at 9.39pm  Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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   Old Thread  #1557 16 Apr 2013 at 9.39pm  Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
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   Old Thread  #1556 16 Apr 2013 at 7.08pm  Login so you can post / reply  Register so you can join in!
A woman is standing at the edge of a cliff trying to get the nerve to jump off.

A passing tramp stops and says, "Since you're about to kill yourself, if you don't mind, could we have sex please?"

The woman says, "No, fcuk off."

The tramp turns to leave and replies, "Fine, I'll just go and wait at the bottom.
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