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In reply to Post #1060
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A girl with a fantastic figure started talking to me at a bar.
"Are you a student?" she asked me.
I said, "Yes,"
"That's great," she added. "What are you studying at the moment?"
"Your tits." I replied.
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Viagra has been great for my sex life...
But my frequent need to urinate has stained my bathroom ceiling tiles piss yellow.
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My doctor has told me I have to stop eating Findus frozen meals.
I have to reduce my Shergar intake.
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In reply to Post #1057
 
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| | | sik | | Posts: 2391 |  | |
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After my wife fainted, the nurse asked, "Is she afraid of needles?"
"No, it was because you told her she wouldn't be able to eat for 24 hours after it
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The government has passed a new bill in parliament.Now Gay men looking for a partner are entitled to more money.Its called the "Knobseekers Allowance". .
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My doctor told me I was extremely sick today.
I only asked him to add another finger during the prostate examination
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What will happen in the first lesbian divorce case?
How will both of them get three quarters of everything?
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In reply to Post #1047
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My wife said that she wants to take more risks in the bedroom.
So I've stuck tiny splinters of glass to all but one of her vibrators..
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"What do you want from me for your birthday?" asked my nan, "It has to be cheap."
I said, "A blow job would be great."
"No chance," she replied.
I said, "A blow job is free, nan."
"A what job?" she asked
"A blow job!" I shouted in her ear.
"Oh, I thought you said a nose job," she laughed. "Pull your pants down then."
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| | | sik | | Posts: 2391 | | |
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After 15 years of marrige im pleased to announce that iv finally found the wifes cl1toris
Its on her sister
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| | | sik | | Posts: 2391 | | |
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In reply to Post #1047
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I thought it would be funny to phone my wife and fart down the phone.
Later, I asked her, "Any interesting phone calls lately?"
She replied, "Just a voicemail from some ********!"
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